I wish...

I wish I had never met them before. I wish I had never met those people I knew I would never see again, actually have a relationship with.
Sometimes, when you least expect it, you suddenly meet someone and you think that is the right for you. You don’t know why, but you are sure of it. It is a kind of “love at first sight”, but not that serious. It happens all the time, with the guy on the subway with whom you have a little talk about unimportant things like college and weather conditions, but he immediately leaves without you even knowing his name. Or the cute guy you meet abroad, the one you see every single morning at the hotel, the one that is having breakfast sitting at the table close to you, the one you share the elevator with, and you can’t take your eyes off. After exchanging a few words and feeling glad to be just near him, both leave, and everything vanishes overnight. And then, just a nice memory remains.
You know you will never see him again, but you can’t avoid thinking about him, and that’s exactly why I wish I had never met him.
This also happens with some fiction characters. Sometimes you fall madly in love with a person that you can only watch on TV. You watch the same movie like a thousand times just because you love the way he is, the way he looks, and how gentle and sweet he is to his girlfriend. And you wish you were that woman. It is like an obsession. But the most depressing thing is that you start searching for that “Mr. Right” who seems not to exist. Or even worse, you start trying to find all these qualities in every guy you meet, but you never find them. So, you start wondering whether they exist or they are just fictional, as they seem to be. I guess if you didn’t know them and then got obsessed with this kind of characters you watch on TV in each episode, you wouldn’t become so demanding each time you meet someone.
That is why I wish I had never met them. It is a kind of masochism because you know you will never be with them, because they don’t exist after all. But on the other hand, I love dreaming that maybe one day, fiction could come true, and I can reach everything I have ever dreamt of.